> My answer may not be of great help, but if you are struggling with this I would really encourage you to move to a completely different environment (i.e. Latin America) where the norms are different. In my opinion this is not something an individual can easily solve. It's a cultural issue. Culture can take a lifetime / generation to change and that's if the people collectively decide it's worth changing.

i am not really struggling with it, i am fortunate enough to already have a lot of good friends. but i do see where you are coming from. it might partly be a cultural thing on my end as well. i went to latin america last year, and the way people approach social interaction there felt much closer to what i am looking for. the more introverted scandinavian vibe can also be really nice at times. i think what i am actually trying to figure out is how not to be a “typical swede” socially, rather than simply trying to make more friends. the main reason i posted this was out of curiosity, how other people approach this, and maybe the discussion can help others (and myself) along the way.

> If we get real, the loneliness epidemic is something we foisted on ourselves. Striving to avoid any awkwardness or discomfort is precisely why social life is so sterile these days. You can't have your cake and eat it too.

you might have a point there. maybe we should challenge ourselves more socially and be more open to awkwardness and discomfort. :o)